Does anyone even know what Scooby Snacks are made from?  Because the craving that that dog and Shaggy had for them was clearly beyond their control.  They put themselves in mortal danger again and again and again for those things.  That is not normal behavior for food.

I submit to you that Scooby Snacks are made from pure heroine.

It’s the only thing that explains their crazy behavior.  Clearly the gang from Mystery Incorporated got Scooby Doo and Shaggy hopelessly addicted to drugs and they cruelly withhold those drugs from them until they do their bidding.  You’ll notice that the other three of this evil gang never partake of the Scooby Snacks.  Of course not.  It wouldn’t do to become addicted to their weapon of evil control.

This is monstrous.  And I know who it was who thought up this diabolical scheme.  It could only be Velma.  Fred is obviously just the muscle for the gang, and Daphne…. Well I shudder to think what role Daphne plays is this sick play.  Is she a willing accomplices?  Or is she as much a victim of this Mystery Incorporated cult.

So there you have it.  Mystery Incorporated uses drug addicted slave dogs to scour the nations abandoned theme parks, carnivals, cruise ships, etc…. In search of fresh prey to extort money from to fund their sick nomadic lifestyle.

We are through the looking glass here, people.

Okay, look it’s one thirty in the morning right now and I’ve been watching the news and listening to talk radio all day.  It’s messing with my brain.  I swear I will never do it again.