Ah the tragic sadness of the one that got away. You know… a little Chloroform and the trunk of a convenient car and you can fix that problem. I’m just saying is all.

What? Don’t look at me that way, I’m a stalker after all. Most of my relationships have ended in the phrase “That’s him, Officer!”

Still the relationship between a zombie and a zombie hunter… That couldn’t have ended well.

Never argue with a woman with a sledge hammer… it’s just good advice.

I found this Zombie related sales pitch on the intertubes the other day.

David & his roommates arent satisfied to just mow down Zombies on Xbox. So they use Windows 7 with Intel Wifi to enjoy an up-close-and-personal Zombie blog from the Internet to their big screen TV. And enjoy some real, live intimacy with the undead.

Um, David, if you want some intimacy with the undead click here.

And when you finally succumb to zombification go here for some zombie romance.

For the record, I have an eight year old son who I think is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me….. So there. (Totally not an accident)

In fact this Saturday I’m taking him and his friend and my daughter fishing. It’s probably one of my favorite things to do with my kids….

And with any luck will generate just enough good will with my children that they will overlook the emotional scarring that I am giving them and NOT put me in a home when I’m old and decrepit.

Keep your fingers crossed.

When you end a relationship, don’t you just wish the other person would have the decency to fall off the face of the earth for you. That would be nice. But it always ends the same way.

Restraining orders,
Mace,
A frantic trip to the store for garbage bags and a side trip to the desert.
Then the chain smoking begins.

Relationships are fun….. right?…… RIGHT?