You would think he’s be supportive of a “Friend” trying to better himself and impress a girl.
You would be wrong though.
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Posts Tagged ‘zombie defense’
17 results.
This is why I check the locks all the time
on October 24, 2012 at 3:00 amPosted In: comics, Main Story
I can’t sleep if I don’t check the locks. I do it at least a dozen times a day, maybe more. Sure you could interpret this as obsessive compulsive disorder of some kind…. Or I could simply be preparing for the coming zombie apocalypse.
If you think about it I’m actually a hero…. NO… A LEGEND!
Leading The Fight Against The Zombie Hordes
on September 7, 2012 at 3:00 amPosted In: comics, Main Story
Leading the fight against the zombie hordes are a select band of men and women of uncommon skill and dedication…. And a guy named Gary.
The comic’s order got a little mixed up. This was actually supposed to have gone up Wednesday. But sometimes I make mistakes. Well I liked it so the comic gets posted today instead.
These are the leaders of the human resistance to the zombie apocalypse. Each with their own deadly and truly unique set of skills that can be applied to surviving the zombies.
Part of the appeal of the zompocalypse to people is the whole idea of testing yourself against overwhelming odds. I would like to think that I have some sort of unique skill that would help me survive where all others would be killed. Let me think what skills do I possess? I’m not a good shot, and I’m a mildly out of shape middle aged guy. What could I do to survive?
My comprehensive list of zombie fighting skills.
- I can make a truly horrible noise with my throat that sounds like a water buffelo getting an enima. (This could intimidate the zombies…. although it does just make my kids laugh)
- I can consume the most vile of gas station hotdogs. (Possibly this could give me the ability to survive on meager rations till the zombies leave)
- I have a bizarre encyclopedic knowledge of old “B” movies. (Actually this is pretty useless, it just drives my wife crazy that she can’t beat me at the game “Scene it”)
- I can get by on less sleep than your average guy (in theory)… This does have the terrible side affect of making me write silly nonsensical blog entries.
That’s it that’s all I got when it comes to skills that might help me survive the zombies. I’m pretty sure I’m doomed.
In a zombie safe house you generally don’t expect to have extras from the movie “Deliverance” pointing shotguns at your face. Incidentally I mentioned the “Squeal like a piggy” reference to a couple twenty something friends of mine and was deeply saddened that they didn’t get it. I feel incredibly old sometimes….. all the time. Thankfully I’m still very immature so it kind of balances out.
Zombie safe house, a subject of much discussion on these here interwebs. What exactly does it take to protect yourself from the undead.
- Food
- Water
- Protection
- Heat
- Cheerleaders
These are all very important things, depending on the capabilities of the zombies your needs for a zombie safe house are going to vary. If you’re being menaced by a George Romero style zombie then you can probably get away with simply boarding up your windows and hunkering down till they rot away.
However if you are facing zombies from say… Return of the Living Dead... you are going to die. Time to relocate. But where? Here’s some less than helpful ideas for places to stay during the zombpocalypse
- The mall (It’s going to suck when the power goes off)
- Wallmart (Have you seen who goes to Walmart… I’ll take the zombies)
- The Mountains (Zombies like mountains too)
- Offshore boat or oil rig (You’re going to starve to death)
- Superman’s fortress of solitude (Superman is a lousy room mate and insists on being the bigger spoon during snuggle time… Not cool)
Never-the-less a temporary zombie safe house if probably a good idea at least to regroup.
Zombies can’t get home owner’s insurance
on February 29, 2012 at 3:00 amPosted In: comics, Main Story
Little known fact about zombies, when they aren’t trying to get into your house and devour you they are very protective of their own homes.
‘K I could have made that part up. But I can truthfully say that when I inevitably become a zombie I’m staying home and playing video games for the rest of the zombpocalypse. Chasing down humans is too risky. They have guns you know!
I may invest in zombie defense at that point just to get the other zombies to leave me alone. Also a generator, gas, and a quick trip to Gamestop for some looting isn’t out of the question.
Crazy Zombie Fighting Slingshot Spikey Thing
on January 7, 2012 at 3:00 amPosted In: Blog, Zombie Survival
Slightly crazy slingshot man Jörge Sprave made this crazy slingshot handweapon combo thingy to fight zombies. I respect that.
Kind of makes sense, eventually you’re going to run out of bullets when facing the zombie horde and you’re going to have to use… rocks hurled from a rubber band and a stick. Then when they get to close you turn the thing over and bonk them on the head. This device has a handy lever to eject the spike from the skull should you get it stuck in some poor brain eater’s noggin.
I’m not sure it’s the “Ultimate” in zombie fighting/survival weaponry but it sure does look fun to play with.
Siri, The New App That Secretly Hates You And Wants You Dead
on October 31, 2011 at 4:00 amPosted In: comics, Random Comics
Happy Halloween! It’s my favorite of all the pagan holidays that gradually changed over time to include candy, sweets, and throwing eggs at my neighbors front door. Hurray for the holidays.
This comic inspired by my crazy desire for the new iPhone. It’s got “Siri” which I’m sure has some usefulness to it, but really seams like it was born out of every nerds secret wish to talk to a woman and have her talk back.
Of course I like to look at everything through the twisted lens of zombification. So I wonder how this App’s going to work when the living dead rise up to kill us all. Will our technology help us or sell us out. Probably depends on how we treat it I suppose.
For those of you who don’t know what Siri is, this thing.
