I tend to prefer my zombies brought back through voodoo, necromancy, or some other dark and forbidden practice best left unnamed and unknowable.

The ways in which the dead are brought back to life are many and varied.

Like the other day I was eating a Dairy Queen Blizzard and I’m pretty sure the ice cream headache killed me. Somehow though I reanimated and I guess now I’m some sort of zombie.

My wife claims I screamed like a girl fell over and hit my head on the toilet seat and passed out for over an hour. You can’t trust her though, she’s a “ginger” and therefore deceptive.

…also why was I eating ice cream in the bathroom…