Time for another “True Tales Of A Cartoonist!” I love my kids. They aren’t “just” slave labor for me. They’re also the perfect gullible audience for whatever nonsense that spills out of my noise hole. Of course my kids are getting used to the fact that everything their father says is potentially a massive whopper of a lie told with a perfectly strait face for my own amusement. I think they are starting to get jaded actually, I’m going to have to come up with more believable Bullcrap to warp their tiny tiny minds.

I was playing Skyrim with my son and we were discussing why their seamed to be a few gold coins in every single container. Then the boy shot some defenseless woodland creature (I train my children to kill) and he was about to move on without ransacking the body.

This is madness. So I instructed the boy to ransack a corpse like a good father should and of course it was full of sweet sweet gold. The boy required an explanation for this inexplicable event. This is what I came up with on the fly.

The fun part of being a cartoonist is that I get to show you exactly how I picture Skyrim’s interesting system for the exchange of wealth. Just a massive swarm of fat fairy babies cramming pieces of gold wherever they will fit and even places where they should never fit. Now I just need to find a disgusting reason for why the fat fairy babies have so much gold.

And what is their horrifying motivation for cramming it where they do. Also is it really necessary for them to cram it so deep? These are the type of questions that will keep me up at night.