Nothing makes me feel older than when I make a “Silence of the Lambs” reference to the twenty somethings I work with and they have no idea what I’m talking about. Come on! That’s one of those movies you have to know about to understand modern horror. Being young is no excuse for not seeing it. Also I’m tired of you young people making me feel creepy old.

Here’s a question, how would you know if a zombie had eczema or if it was simple rot setting in? Would your skin care routine change much for either. I imagine you would need a lot of moisturizer, possibly preservatives, and maybe even a protective coating.

So if you become a zombie you’ll need skin cream, formaldehyde, and Minwax floor sealant