For the record I’m not saying women don’t know pain. That would be ridiculous. My wife has had two children and the pain she’s gone through for that dwarfs my own manly pain by a considerable margin. She also endured this trial with a grace and decorum that I am in no way, shape, or form capable of. Clearly she is the tougher entity in our bizarre relationship.
Never the less there is something unique and excruciatingly painful about being woken from a dead sleep by a hundred and fifty pound Rottweiler colliding with my super manly nether regions at top speed. This happened to me last week and I shall not soon forget it. The chances of our family getting that third child were dramatically reduced at that moment.
And now that I’ve put that image into your heads you will not be able to get it out.
My nether regions….. and all that that implies. You’re welcome.