If You’re Reading This Then You’re Not Dead
on December 21, 2012 at 3:00 amSoooo, you all enjoying the zombie apocalypse? Everyone having a good time with all the rivers of blood, fire and brimstone…. hails of frog……. NO???? That’s because the Mayans are jerks and there’s no ultimate doom awaiting us all. I am disappointed.
I live in Utah and I can tell you that it’s part of the culture here that there is a belief that the apocalypse is coming in our lifetime. I’m not saying I believe that, it’s just what I’ve been told since I was a little kid. But preparedness and saving up a years food storage are topics of conversation I regularly hear.
Actually the fact that Utah is something of a blasted wasteland already and the survivalist cultural attitude here I believe this state is uniquely prepared for a zombie uprising. Not that we’re going to survive. Of course we won’t, it’s just that we’ll probably last longer than the other states. So the zombie apocalypse should be a good time.
Except that if you are reading this then once again NO ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE!
Damn you Mayans! How dare you give me hope for a blasted future filled with relentless hordes of the shambling dead forever hungry for human flesh.
Mayans. They trolled all the believers big time. Big brownie points to them!
You underestimate your fellow states. Take Georgia, for instance. We here in this state are a bunch of beered-up rednecks in the classic setting for a zombie apocalypse. And we are always portrayed as bozzed-up, hooting and hollering while having a blast shooting any zombie that comes our way.
That is only a stereotype, but my family fits it very well.
Sigh. Disappointing, I’m sure, but not unexpected. Assuming the world ends with the Mayan calendar is like expecting the Rapture because the local 7-Eleven is out of 2013 datebooks.
People are soooooo gullible. But still, it would have been fun, neh?
Do keep in mind that it’s not yet the 22nd and for us in the US it’s not even Noon.(Well, not when I post this anyway)
Also, did you check out the forums, Carter?
I promise I’ll post in the forums… if I have time…. OK the Mayan’s were right… The guy just didn’t carry the 1. … currently I’m stuck at work surrounded by zombies… I don’t think I’ll be getting out of this one. Carter keep this comic going as long as you can. If I turn into one of them I promise to turn south and bring the zombie curse to the US, hey what are neighbours for, but to borrow your hammers and bring about the zombie apocalypse. Oh crap one is coming this way, this is it…..
Hey there … my bad.. no zombies.. just the usual Friday morning, in need of coffee co-workers. I guess I should call an ambulance for that guy I brained in the bathroom.
That guy you brained… Tell him it was a learning experience and he should just walk it off.
Or that it’s good for him and builds character.
Now there there… carter its not yet the end of the day there is still plenty of time for the apocalypse to happen.
I’ve got my fingers crossed.
To be fair, they didn’t even imply Zombies. If anything, it was more like a Chinchilla Apocalypse that was implied.
Well, Carter, if it helps, we have found a new and unusual and very cruel way to kill zombies. We force them to listen to Jane Fonda Aerobics videos with Peewee Herman voice overs. They rip their own heads off and smash them into the ground to make it stop.
But the ones who survive that would be extra tough and therefore more terrifying.
You could be breeding a race of super zombies and not even realize it.
it could have started on the 21st, but not have infected many people yet. Either that, or it might be getting covered up by the government. They cant afford to have mass hysteria right before a holiday!
Never stopped the current leadership. Besides, nothing like an air fuel bomb or a cluster bomb to cure a zombie plague real fast.
They always try that in the movies though and it never works.
I submit to you that zombie blood may completely non-flammable. We may even start putting it in fire extinguishers.
would we even know until a few people who had illegal organ tranplants or harvesting turned and attacked in a high media area… to be honest though I was hoping for somthing much more insane but surivalable.
( unfortantely based on some of the games that are out it might be 2012 for quality games atleast… maybe maybe not we’ll see how many pay to win games and basic annoying super hero games pop up in the coming year.)