Virgin Sacrifice….. Why?  Why has that ever even existed?  Sure you could argue that someone who is a virgin is more pure and therefore more valued as a sacrifice to your evil deity of choice.

I however argue that the whole concept of virgin sacrifice was probably originally thought of by ugly  dudes attempting to convince potentially sacrificial fair maidens to essentially “Give it up.”  That’s just my theory.

I imagine the sales pitch being, “Sure I’m a troglodyte, and I physically and intellectually disgust you, but if we were to get busy is would save you from being tossed into a volcano….. Wink Wink.”

You can’t deny that that is a very effective sales pitch.

However, if a woman is willing to turn you down in favor of a painful plunge into lava flow…. Then I assure you, you are one truly repellent dude.

That’s got to play merry hell with your self esteem.