In a zombie safe house you generally don’t expect to have extras from the movie “Deliverance” pointing shotguns at your face. Incidentally I mentioned the “Squeal like a piggy” reference to a couple twenty something friends of mine and was deeply saddened that they didn’t get it. I feel incredibly old sometimes….. all the time. Thankfully I’m still very immature so it kind of balances out.
Zombie safe house, a subject of much discussion on these here interwebs. What exactly does it take to protect yourself from the undead.
- Food
- Water
- Protection
- Heat
- Cheerleaders
These are all very important things, depending on the capabilities of the zombies your needs for a zombie safe house are going to vary. If you’re being menaced by a George Romero style zombie then you can probably get away with simply boarding up your windows and hunkering down till they rot away.
However if you are facing zombies from say… Return of the Living Dead... you are going to die. Time to relocate. But where? Here’s some less than helpful ideas for places to stay during the zombpocalypse
- The mall (It’s going to suck when the power goes off)
- Wallmart (Have you seen who goes to Walmart… I’ll take the zombies)
- The Mountains (Zombies like mountains too)
- Offshore boat or oil rig (You’re going to starve to death)
- Superman’s fortress of solitude (Superman is a lousy room mate and insists on being the bigger spoon during snuggle time… Not cool)
Never-the-less a temporary zombie safe house if probably a good idea at least to regroup.
Prisons would make got fortresses. No one gets in, you can dig a safe tunnel und if you use thecourts inside you have some room to farm food.
Also: Your list? needs more points. I see cheerleaders but no cowgirls? What if I wake up late in teh night and have a sudden craving for a skimpy cowgirl?
That’s a safety issue!
I can’t argue with that. We’ll get you some cowgirls…. for safety of course.
Well, the new season of The Walking Dead is going to show us the problems with using a Prison as an Anti-Zombie Fortress; the primary one being that prisons are extremely full of prisoners, and after a zombie apocalypse, that will mean that it’s extremely full of zombies, lurking all over the place. You’d likely be fighting for your live more inside a prison than you would outside.
That is, unless you somehow find a prison that was empty; but there is no such beast in the US.
Yupp, empty prisons are a rare thing. I do not know about american prisons but wouldn’t it be an option to just walk from cell to cell with a lead pipe and bust them one after another?
Of course, getting insde might be difficult…
Maybe I need to think of something else.
If we can’t use Superman’s Fortress of Solitude, could we use the Batcave instead? I’m pretty sure the waterfall makes it more or less zombie-proof, and if Batman has a fail-proof plan to take everyone down in the Justice League, I’m sure zombies are no problem. Even Return of the Living Dead-esque ones.
Failing that, we could always steal the Batmobile to make a speedy getaway.
…And everything else.