The Reason The Zombies Will Kill Us All #1
on August 17, 2012 at 1:20 amThe Reason The Zombies Will Kill Us All is humanity’s horrendous peripheral vision. I’ve been watching a full weeks worth of old zombie movies including the original “Dawn of the Dead” and judging by the characters in the movie humans are incapable of looking left or right.
It’s not like zombies are particularly subtle they wonder around and try to get you. However, the second you find yourself in a movie you must lose all situational awareness. This I can actually see myself doing in real life as I startle more easily than a meth addict hungering for a fix.
Sadly my co-workers take great delight sneaking up on my at my day job and startling the ever loving hell out of me. I almost always jump and scream like a little girl.
In my defense however I scream like a damned manly little girl. A lot of chest hair and junk.
As I learned in the original X-Com UFO defense years ago, if your entire team is packing miniguns with high explosive ammo, does it matter? You just sweep the whole area and wipe them all out.
Civilians? Hostages? Things you don’t want decimated?
Meat Shields and zombie making materials.
Aha but the problem is you will never use that ammo because you won’t see the zombies coming. Nobody in a movie has any peripheral vision until it’s too late.
By the time you start thinking “hey I should randomly spray the area with bullets just in case there’s a zombie somewhere” he’s already taking a chunk out of you.
Allow me a quote from oots, if it’s okay… and if it’s not okay… well, then simply don’t read it.
As the size of the explosion increases, the number of problems it cannot solve approaches zero.
Lol, and with that quote we all just got put on the FBI’s watch list.
Don’t worry, my name is there in bold text already.