And They Said “Murder” Wasn’t A Useful Skill
on June 6, 2012 at 3:00 amPosted In: comics, Main Story
I submit to you that a certain lack of Moral and Ethical hangups (Like don’t murder people) would actually come in handy during the zombie apocalypse.
That begs the question, what are you willing to do when society breaks down and there are no “enforceable” rules.
The following are key to my “Ethically and Morally Challenged Zombie Survival Plan”.
- Food will be scarce during the zombie apocalypse therefore five minutes after it starts I’m going cannibal. I don’t worry about food as my neighbors will be my tasty tasty snacks.
- I feel I have a duty to repopulate the planet therefore I will somehow have to “acquire” potential mates. (Cheerleaders I’m look’n at you)
- Entertainment will be a high priority to stave off madness so I plan on beginning looting almost immediately.
- I’ve seen enough 80′s horror movies to know that only the two prettiest people ever survive. As a result if I find myself in a group of survivors I will quietly do away with anyone better looking than me.
Oh sure you could stick to your ethics and try to survive, I’m sure that’ll work out for you. I’ll be thinking of you while in my zombie fortress surrounded by my harem and extensive progeny.
(Sigh.. I’m going to hell. I know this)
You may be going to hell, but you’re taking a fun path to get there… unless your wife kills you tonight. (She knows where you sleep).
Good Luck!
PS: don’t forget you will need to eat veggies to stave off the Scurvy. That is how I think most people will die in the Zompoc, improper diet.
That’s what I was thinking, his wife might have a problem with steps 1,2, and 4.
Nah she’s used to all the ridiculous stuff that comes out of my mouth.
This is actually the best place she could ever be!!!!!
Turning cannibal? Well…… Meat is meat!
I would avoid cannibalism at least during the initial stages of the zombie outbreak. When things first start going down it will be difficult to tell who has been bitten and infected and who hasnt. Eating people right away may result exposure to tainted meat. Also during that time people will be frightened and ready to blow the head off of anything that comes too close. Start attacking people to eat them and you are very likely to be mistaken as one of the undead and meet an untimely end
Avoid cannibalism for fear of getting caught? Madness, it’s the fear that flavors the meat….
Wow, I just read that. That’s kind of dark. I feel shame now.
while you may be righta bout getting caught tainted infected pre zombie meat probably tastes terrible
This aint nothin, you wanna end up in hell, do a zombie last supper or sistine chapel or somethin and mention youre receptive to tithes….
I mean think of the response for the sistine chapel with cthullu babies rinnin around on it instead of cherubs….. Assuming of course you want to risk the wrath of the old ones by attatching cuteness to his portfolio.
I’m pretty sure the zombie last supper’s been done. ‘Course I couldn’t do it anyway, I have a very strict no talking about religion or politics policy with my art.
People get to cranky about it…. also I get in trouble with it as I have a big mouth.
Not to mention that you live in Utah (if I remember correctly) , probably a lot of religious people there.