Kopi Luwak, that is a real thing. They take those beans, feed them to some monkeys, and they crap out coffee gold.
Doesn’t that sound appetizing? No? Why not?
Aha! but does it have to run through the digestive track of a monkey to make it delicious? What if we were to say cram it down the gullet of a zombie?
I may have just discovered an amazing way to make money during the zombie apocalypse. It’s perfect! It satisfies the zombie’s craving for flesh and by harvesting the “Leavings” of the zombie I’ll make huge amounts of money selling disgusting coffee beans to hipsters with too much money.
I’m a genius!
Just one question: “Do zombies poop?” Because if they don’t I’m going to be broke.
All that a zombie eats has to go somewhere… if they’re dead and don’t digest I would expect that movement helps push things down and out…You need a name for the coffee. Kopi Luwak … go latin: Mortuus Capulus (Translation gotten from an online source) … or Esperanto: Mortinta Viro Kafo (sadly translation not taken from an online source.)
Zombie digestion is a weird topic of mine, clearly zombies move. That means their muscles work. Peristaltic contractions are what moves the food throughout your digestive track and that’s just muscles. I see no reason why zombies can’t at the very least move chewed up food through their guts.
Now do their stomachs still secrete hydrochloric acid? I have no idea, but their intestines are still likely to contain living bacteria that will break up the food as well.
I think the only way to truly solve this riddle is to catch a zombie and vivisect him.
I love how civil she acts up until he says they don’t have a monkey. It probably would have been safer to have not said anything at all other than words af agreement.
If I were Moon I probably would have been creeping out the door, or more likely I would also have been distracted by her cleavage and therefore helpless.
“Just one question: “Do zombies poop?” Because if they don’t I’m going to be broke.”
Funny you should ask: http://zombieresearchsociety.com/archives/2103
That is the best picture ever.
I swear she reminds me of my ex sister in law. I wonder if she is on the same meds cough.meth.cough the sister in law was on.
Every person in Utah is on something just to deal with the pain of living in Utah I think.
Hell, I take Prosac for anxiety… I love that stuff. Makes life not suck.
Whatever a zombie eats is going to rot inside of it, because it has no metabolism to absorb any nutrients, so sooner or later, said zombie has to get rid of all that rotting flesh inside of it. That’s going to happen one of two ways; either its stomach explodes and everything drops out, or else it dribbles out of what orifices there are down below.
Oh, and technically, it’s Civets, not monkeys that they use to make that coffee. Civets basically look like a cross between a cat and a monkey. I think it’s been established that Moon is more jellyfish than any other animal.
Sheila doesn’t know the difference between a monkey and a civit. Besides monkey is a funny sounding word.
Ahhh…. That explains why I always heard it was a cat that shat these beans out.
It begs the question: Who is the weirdo who first made a cup of coffee from crapped out beans and how drunk was he to do it?
Strikes me that the ‘live bacteria’ in a zombies intestines would actually be undead bacteria.
I theorize that it is that very undead bacteria that could be the cause of the zombie apocalypse in the first place. Possibly it came about through the over use of antibiotics.
A genius idea that will soon be a movie, Copyright to the both of us!